So, I’ve come to that point in my journey where I have to start focusing on the resolution. The decision I now have to make isn’t easy.
To be fully free of my past I need to prepare to find out the truth about my abuser. Having lived under a cloud for over thirty years, I need to know if he is dead or alive. I understand the ramifications of this choice, but he has got away Scott free for all these years. Why should I have to live with this uncertainty hanging over me?
I need to resolve this, so I can truly be free, I realise that I need to be stronger than I am. I’ve now started this process, I believe that with the right tools I can finally be free.
I need to break the flight/fight circle, to be able to cope with the stress of finally discussing this with the authorities. I need to know if if he is dead or alive. I know the risks but I need to have closure.