I am afraid of falling in love. I feel that I will never be able to enjoy the feeling of being in love. I think the fact I was abused when I was 13 just as I was beginning to have those feelings. The abuse meant I shut down my emotions to the point where I felt nothing but shame for a quarter of a century.
I know I shouldn’t fear love but I do. I am just worried how any woman would react to me sharing my past. I am scared of being rejected.
I feel that my brain has been rewired to stop me from loving. I really want to have a family but I’m afraid to take the first step.